Thursday, March 5, 2009

I feel so guilty

I continue to feel terribly guilty about missing Thing2's symptoms of seizure.

I'm more and more convinced that she had one or more seizures starting sometime last week...

She saw a neurologist today. He said the mania she's experiencing is likely an effect of the seizure. He ordered EKG and MRI's. I assume we'll get the results tomorrow. It's disconcerting how regularly and seriously they ask me if she as a Durable Power of Attourney and advance directives.

She is such a sweetie. It breaks my heart to see her so ill. When she was admitted, she weighed only 90 pounds. That is more than 10 pounds less than she weighed about 10-days ago. Most of that weight loss likely happened after the first undetected seizure.

This whole experience brings home for me something that I've always known. When you have a mental illness, it's very hard to get optimal medical care. Even those who know you well can miss signs of illness that would have been unmistakable in someone else.

One blessing, the nursing care she has received has generally been good. The main problem has been their failure to order and deliver and in timely fashion medicine that she needs for regular function of bladder and bowel. This morning I snapped at her nurse when she suggested that Thing2 should just try sitting on the commode again. This after taking 2-hours to get medicine that should have been scheduled and available for her to take first-thing in the morning.


  1. You can occasionally do something about the nursing care, but don't beat yourself up about missing something that was well hidden until recently, 'k?

  2. Thanks Doug.

    I have no experience or knowledge in seizure, but I knew that I was seeing and experiencing behavior that I had never before seen... and after 31-years together, if I haven't seen it, there's something new wrong.

    Still, you're affirmation that it wasn't obvious helps me feel better.